


Faded Heart

by colderb0nes



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-28
Updated: 2017-12-28
Packaged: 2019-02-23 03:11:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,075
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13181154
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/colderb0nes/pseuds/colderb0nes
Summary: The IPRE gang knew deep down that this day was going to come, but no one wanted to acknowledge it. Now they can't ignore it. Magnus is going to die.





	Faded Heart

**Author's Note:**

> Just a one shot off of the scene in the finale that ripped my heart out l o l

Magnus wakes up and immediately knows that something is different about this day. His body is tired in a way that is vaguely familiar and yet entirely new all at once, but what really catches his attention is the strange stillness he feels in his chest. His heart is beating, but there is something different about it. It no longer feels like it is fighting a battle so many years after The Hunger is gone. No, this is calmer, more serene. Magnus knows this feeling best from quiet moments with Julia.   
This is peace.   
A wave of understanding and acceptance washes over him as he moves his body to sit up the best that he can, feeling somewhat winded. He knows what death feels like, but it has never crept so gently up to him. It was always a looming shadow in his periphery. Now, though, he knows that today is the day that it will find him for the last time, and Magnus is okay with it. He is ready. He hopes that his friends are, too.

***

Merle is the first person to arrive, letting himself into Magnus’s humble home and taking a seat on the small wooden stool at the bedside. He looks over to his friend, surprised at seeing no fear, but something that looks almost like relief. Merle swallows the emotion building up inside of him, trying to hide the way that he wishes to Pan that he could stop this. He wants to tell Magnus that he wishes that he could somehow get him to grow new tree limbs to match Merle’s arm- anything to have the chance for Magnus to grow alongside him again, to not have to see the sun rise without the wonder in the eyes of the boy turned man right in front of him who appreciates it every day. Instead, Merle settles for,

“Hey, buddy.” He smiles, but he knows that it doesn’t reach his eyes. Magnus sees it too, but says nothing about it.

“Hey,” Magnus answers, feeling the waves of emotion from the man he had always respected more than he let on. “Thanks for coming.”

“There was no question,” Merle answers immediately, looking directly into Magnus’s eyes. “I wouldn’t miss it.” He continues, casting his eyes down to the beautifully polished wood floor. He hates that it sounds like a celebration when this day is going to be one of the worst in his long life.

“Merle,” Magnus speaks, but coughs after he begins to talk.

“Save your energy,” Merle replies. He looks sadly at Magnus, his emotions feeling like a cage that was only going to squeeze tighter as the day wore on.

“Merle, this is important.” Magnus says, now with more urgency. “I need you to go into that wooden box on the other nightstand.” He lifts a shaky arm to point to where the nightstand that he had made for Julia stood proudly, looking too new from lack of use. Merle hops down from the wooden stool and hobbles over to the nightstand, reaching up and barely reaching the small box. He looks questioningly at Magnus, who silently implores him to open it. Merle thinks a word that Pan wouldn’t care much for as he sees Julia’s pristine wedding band, also still too new from lack of use. It tugs at his heart, reminding him of how much Magnus has lost, and how little he talks about it. Merle takes the ring out of the box and brings it to Magnus, placing it in his palm, smiling softly at the peace the contact with the band seems to bring the ailing man. “Thank you.” Magnus says earnestly, closing his eyes.

Merle feels himself starting to panic, frantically thinking a mix of no not yet and Pan please no and you have to wait for the others when Magnus opens his eyes again. Merle thinks he’s going to cry out of relief right there, but he is provided with a welcome distraction when Taako makes his presence well known by all but kicking the door open and looking with wild eyes around the room before letting his eyes fall onto Magnus, who is lying peacefully in bed.

Taako gently moves Merle aside and approaches Magnus, pain creasing his face but he refuses to acknowledge it. He gently places a hand on Magnus’s white hair at the top of his head, masking his pain by commenting,

“I haven’t seen you looking like this since the last time you fought a bear.” Taako feels pride in the strength of the laugh that comes out of Magnus’s mouth, feeling hope just for a moment that this is a false alarm and he will be able to see Magnus’s eyes reflecting the glow of a fire another day. It gives him an idea. “Do you want me to light your fireplace?” Taako asks. He tries to ignore the way his eyes fill up with tears at the same time that his mouth widens into a smile at Magnus’s response. He turns around to face the fireplace adjacent to the end of the bed and confidently casts a spell with shaky hands, He glances over to Magnus and swallows the lump in his throat as he sees the sense of wonder that Magnus always had in his eyes around magic even though he was used to it. “Did you eat today?” Taako asks, wanting to get out of this room where the anguish between him and Merle is suffocating him. When Magnus shakes his head in response, Taako nods and says, “I’m going to make you the best damn soup you’ve ever had.” 

“Can you make it taco soup?” Magnus asks, a twinkle in his eyes that almost breaks Taako right on the spot.

“Whatever you want, Mango.” Taako replies, walking out of the room in a hurry. He leans against the kitchen counter and puts his head in his hands. He could retrieve ancient relics, stop the hunger, and be the best wizard around, but there was nothing that he could do to keep Magnus alive. What cuts Taako the most is how okay with it Magnus is. It makes him feel worse for feeling like he did when he learned about Lup. He hopes that Magnus doesn’t feel as lonely as Lup ever did. He lifts his head and reaches into his pocket, calling Kravitz.

“Taako?” Kravitz answers, sounding confused and worried. 

“It’s Magnus.” Taako breathes.

“I haven’t seen him-”

“-Because he’s still alive.” Taako cuts Kravitz off. “But you will. I need you to make sure that he…” Taako trails off, gagging as he tries to voice what comes next. He hates the finality of saying it out loud. Kravitz helps him by making sure that he doesn’t have to.

“I will. I promise.” Kravitz says emphatically. Taako nods, even though Kravitz can’t see him. It’s all that he can do when the dam inside of him broke the second he got the call but he couldn’t bring himself to cry about it. No, this loss cut so much deeper. “I love you.” Kravitz says, sending so much more than just those words. 

“I love you too.” Taako answers, hanging up. He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, trying to recenter himself as much as he can. He needs to get this right for Magnus. It’s his last chance. Taako opens his eyes and starts to cook.

It’s evening now, and Magnus’s room is crowded with the people who love him. Lucretia sits on the stool beside the bed, gently stroking Magnus’s hair. Carey and Killian are standing next to Lucretia and Magnus. Carey holds Magnus’s hand and strokes the back of it with her thumb, whispering a chorus of it’s okay, everything is going to be okay, and no one is entirely sure whether it’s more for Magnus or for them, but they cling to the words as they hang in the air. None of them know what comes next, but Carey’s words are the hat rack they hang their hope on.

Angus is standing at the foot of the bed closest to the fire. He wants to kick and scream and cry about how this isn’t fair, but Magnus has seen him grow up and Angus just wants to make Magnus proud, so he settles on trying to force a smile while his stomach hurts as if someone is kicking him repeatedly. He knows that it’s just the realization that Magnus, the man that Angus thought was so strong and brave and would never die was going to do just that, right before his very eyes. Angus chokes back a sob and quickly wipes away the stray tears that leak from his eyes. For Magnus.

Davenport is standing at the other side of the bed, a hand on Magnus’s leg. He has a hard time reconciling the images of Magnus when he was younger and the man lying down in the bed in front of him in this dark room lit only by the orange hues from the fire. Barry and Lup are standing and holding one another as they look over Magnus, finding comfort in how at peace he seems as he holds Julia’s wedding band tightly in his hands. 

“Thank you for being here.” Magnus says, his voice raspy. He looks around the room at each and every beautiful face that he has been so lucky to have met on his journey. “I love you.”

“We love you too, buddy. We always will. This isn’t the last of the tres horny boys.” Merle says, leaning forward from his place next to Taako to take another look into his beloved friend’s eyes. 

“I’m getting sleepy.” Magnus says, not wanting to tell his friends that his vision is starting to get fuzzy. 

“Just rest, Mango. We love you so much.” Taako says, stepping forward just in time to see Magnus blink exactly two more times before his eyes close permanently.  
Taako lets the fire go out. He stands over Magnus as the room is swallowed in darkness, and he lets his tears fall. He feels Merle leaning against his hip, his small body trembling. As his eyes adjust to the darkness, Taako can just make out Lucretia sitting and staring ahead into nothing, her hand still in Magnus’s hair. Angus has slid down against the wall beside the fireplace and is doing his best to muffle his cries as Davenport bows his head solemnly. Lup is leaning her head into Barry’s shoulder just as much as Barry is leaning into her. Magnus is still. They all hope that Magnus finds the peace he believed in. It hurts to think of him in past tense, and it hurts how easily they had fallen into it. No one wants to say it. 

***

Magnus is shocked by how clear everything seems suddenly. He feels younger than he did just a few moments prior. He stretches, grinning at how good it feels to be spry again. He hears a throat clear behind him and turns around, smiling when he sees Kravitz. It’s bittersweet. 

“Come on,” Kravitz says, leading the way to a house just in time for the door to open. Magnus sees her, and suddenly everything is perfect. 

***

Taako and Merle stand outside of Magnus’s house, looking up at the stars in the clear sky. Neither says anything. They don’t have to. Magnus is gone, and there was nothing to prepare them for the ache in their bones because of it. 

“Sirs?” Angus’s voice asks quietly behind them. Taako and Merle turn around to see the rest of their friends looking at them. “Is it okay if we stand with you?”

“Sure, Ango.” Taako answers, beckoning for everyone to join them. They form a line, finding themselves grasping for each other’s hands as they all look up toward the sky once more. They don’t know how long they stand there until they notice a star that seems to grow larger in the sky. It blinks and twinkles more brilliantly than the others, and for the first time since it happened, each of them feels a smile tug at the corner of their mouths. They know that it’s a message from Kravitz. Peace is out there, and Magnus has found it.

For now, it’s the only salve on the wound that they need. In time, they will make peace with it too.


End file.
